What do you want to be when you grow up?
I know you’ve been asked this question. You’ve probably asked a child this question too.
So much emphasis is put on what we’re going to be when we grow up that it’s no wonder many of us consider our careers our identities!
‘I’m a lawyer.’
‘I’m a doctor.’
‘I’m a CEO.’
‘I’m a teacher.’Â
We never answer, ‘a person who practices law’ or ‘a person who runs a company’. It's strange when you think about it, isn’t it? We build our lives around our careers, our social circles involve colleagues, we advance our education for promotions and spend most of our waking hours each day at work!
I know what happens when you assume but I'm going to assume for many people, their identity is tied to their career. If not, perhaps your identity is tied to your relationships; "I'm a partner/parent/sibling" etc. Maybe it's something else? I love to hear from you on that. But, if you’re a professional, you probably get at least some fulfillment from your career, coworkers, industry and all that you’ve accomplished.
At least that was my case.
I worked in the radio industry for almost 20 years and was so career-focused. When I started, I worked very hard, took on any adjacent side-jobs that I could to hone my skills and become the best I could be while working in radio and, for a short time, TV. Eventually, I was hired for the Pure Country 93 (formerly BX93) morning radio show. I. Was. THRILLED! The morning show is the top job in radio and aside from moving to a bigger city (which I wasn’t up for), I felt I had made it.
Along with doing the actual work of performing a show each morning came the exposure I really wasn’t ready for; good and bad. I eventually became ‘Rachel from the Dave and Rachel Show.’ And to anyone listening, that was my identity. It’s who I was to them anyway. Among other things, it’s how I was introduced amongst both colleagues and friends and it eventually became my identity too. It sounds egotistical but I think that to work in any form of news/entertainment broadcasting, you need to have even a small ego to put yourself out there. It is what it is.
So, when I decided to quit my radio job and focus on my voice over business full time, I had a bit of an identity crisis! Who would I be if I was no longer, ‘Rachel from the radio?’ Would anyone care about me anymore? Was I only valuable if I was entertaining the masses each morning? Would I lose friends because I didn’t have the perceived social value anymore? How do I navigate that? And is the pending change worth everything I'm giving up?
Yes, I know how that sounds... now.Â
Plus, I liked my radio job. Loved it, even! I really enjoyed connecting with listeners each day and finding the commonalities to exploit and have fun with. I loved my coworkers and this was my dream job!
Perhaps you can relate if you've left your professional career as a teacher, social worker, nurse, police officer or anything else, to do something different. Maybe you've left a relationship or a familiar city. It’s a strange feeling, isn’t it? To make the change and re-categorize yourself as something new. Perhaps you’ve had this feeling in retirement. If you’re not working, who are you? What do you fill your time with now?
Now that I'm two years into working for myself I find I am embracing the freedom of both my schedule and identity. I've settled into the comfort of being alone each day and am trying to navigate this new career to set myself up for the long-term. The imposter syndrome is slowly fading and making way for a new identity.
Maybe a change is the push we need to actually find out who we are, deep down, as people. Not as job titles. It’s cliche, but maybe it’s a good thing that we learn to define ourselves rather than letting the world define us. Maybe it’s easier for some people to redefine themselves than others.
I wouldn’t know. I’m still in the process of redefining myself. Does that ever stop?
Turns out, we are so much more than what we become when we grow up.
Have you experienced a career change and/or identity shift? I'd love to hear about your experience, in the comments or privately!
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